Gem Against Flesh

by Devan Barlow

Art by Seren Derryth

I had seen Teodor dozens of times, as silent in his Cavalier’s retinue as I was in mine. Sometimes our eyes would meet, amid the talk of rare blooms or luxurious perfumes. 

When I dared, in between recording figures and handing over the documents the more senior clerks demanded, I would meet Teodor’s smile with a brief one of my own. I suspected love was not quite the right word for what hung silently between us, but I wasn’t sure what a more exact one would be. 

Until one day, in the crush of both retinues attempting to leave at the exact same time so as not to cede a shred of position, a note was slipped into my palm. Back in the privacy of my room, I unfolded this ripped-off corner of a trade report to find that it revealed a time and place for a clandestine meeting. 

We remained silent, the only thing we had ever known to be together. We met a second time, and a third, always silently. The pens and ledgers we clutched always, to provide the cover of work if we were discovered, allowed us to learn each other’s names. 

Until our fourth meeting. A trading party, newly returned with fireworks, had chosen to conduct a demonstration in a nearby courtyard during some daytime revel, and the sudden burst of noise and light startled us both. 

We drew together instinctively, hands tangling, and before I could even register the depth of any of these shocks, I gasped. 

A gleaming topaz fell from my lips, and into the palm Teodor raised to catch it. 

Gems against flesh is one of the softest sounds, yet this was somehow so much louder than every time in the past when similar jewels had fallen into my own hands. 

#

I had been just old enough to begin apprenticing in my liege’s retinue when the first gem had slipped from my mouth. Another topaz of alarm, when without thinking I touched a hot pan on the small stove in my family’s quarters. 

On my mother’s frantic insistence, I worked at the art of emotionless speech. More importantly, I perfected the art of feeling the precise moment the gem appeared at the back of my throat, and the sort of internal wrenching that allowed me to secrete it in the side of my mouth. When I couldn’t manage this soundlessly, I covered it up with a pretend cough. 

A short time later, after my apprenticeship had begun exposing me to greater swathes of both reality and gossip, I asked if there was anything she should tell me about who I really was. Or who my father was, beyond the vague memory I had of account books and the scent of pepper, before he had fallen to spell-wights.

She insisted both that she and her husband were my parents, and that she had never known of someone so afflicted as I was, as the gem-speakers of the Ducal line were, until joining my father here. She had worked in a trading firm beyond the forest, where they had met, and upon their marriage brought her connections and know-how into our liege’s retinue. 

“It’s something in the air here,” she always said, “it’s not you.”

#

Two days after Teodor learned my secret, his liege, the Cavalier Oslwinel, returned to court. Bringing not only cargos of coffee and incense, but also his great-nephew Casimir. 

Casimir made proper obeisance before the thrones of the drab Duchess and the amethyst-bedecked Duke. Yet after they acknowledged him, the young man declared, “I intend to woo the Lady Rosine!”

Excited gasps and cries filled the audience chamber. There hadn’t been a wooing challenge in more than a season, and not a successful one in several. 

All eyes went to the Duke and Duchess to see if they would allow this potential husband for their only still-unmarried child. Except I found myself distracted by the woman standing behind their thrones, hair intricately piled on top of her head and accented with ornaments of appreciative opals. The Keeper of Paths, the only person aware of every safe route through the forest and across the ocean. Her guidance was necessary to survive the spell-wights. Though neither Duke nor Duchess looked back to her, I felt the Keeper of Paths’ piercing regard cast on the new challenger. 

For any Cavalier hoping to travel beyond Linviorenk and survive the spell-wights must also bear a brooch of three magical gems – a moonstone of scorn, a sapphire of fear, and an amethyst of true love, all from a gem-speaker.

Neither the realms beyond the forest to the north and east, nor those across the sea from us, had gem-speakers who could provide safe passage through the spell-wights. Yet all craved luxuries, luminous dyes and elegant furniture and sumptuous wines, and the Ducal line of Linviorenk had built up their trade empire accordingly. 

Back in the chambers of my own still-absent liege, her second put us all to work learning everything we could about this newcomer. Whether he successfully wooed Rosine or merely became another hanger-on wearing secondhand gems, there would be wrangling for position. 

Turning a corner the next afternoon, I was startled to find Teodor waiting for me. I reminded myself that he had no proof, and anyone falsely claiming to find a gem-speaker would be as unwelcome as one who pretended to be a gem-speaker. 

Except something of the comfortable silence between us prevailed, and I found, unwillingly, that I missed him. I allowed him to draw me onto an empty stretch of the ramparts.

“Casimir doesn’t think he can get the gems.”

Meaning, I knew, he didn’t believe he could break Lady Rosine’s will. I didn’t stop to wonder how Teodor had convinced his liege’s great-nephew to confide in him.

“But,” Teodor pressed on, “I told him I can help!” Then, as if there was doubt and not horror in my stare. “No one will believe Rosine if she says she didn’t speak the gems herself!”

I knew he was right. No one would, and certainly no one would admit to such an impossibility as a gem-speaker not of the Ducal line.

“Casimir promised us passage out with the next trading expedition.” He grabbed my hands and I forced myself not to make a sound. “We could be safe.”

#

I didn’t let myself look at Teodor as I summoned scorn. Besides, there was plenty to inspire me. 

The Cavaliers and their clerks and all their assorted hangers-on, all boasting their knowledge of gem lore, even though most of their own gems were the lesser stuff, annoyance, bemusement, maybe scorn at best, and most of those bought second- or third-hand. Who spoke of gem-speakers’ “flirtatious game” of pretending not to like the challengers before finally granting the precious jewels. Because after all, why wouldn’t the Ducal descendants want to use their inborn gift to help city prosperity? 

The moonstone I spoke was flawless.

Teodor took it, vibrating with excitement, and darted out of the room. A moment later he swung back inside, kissed me, then sped away even faster. 

Casimir would be locked into the Lady Rosine’s apartments at sunset, and met the next morning by everyone at court, to present the jewel. No true gem-speaker of Linviorenk would have ever dreamed of assisting a challenger to perpetrate a fraud. Our scheme would likely work.

But I didn’t dare appear uninterested in the results, so I joined the crowd the next morning. 

Just before the doors to her room were unlocked, distressed shrieks raced through the palace, quickly followed by calls for a healer and the arrival of a familiar woman, bedraggled and wounded and all but carried by a pair of guards. She was part of my liege’s retinue, having accompanied her on the most recent trading trip. 

My liege, and all the rest of her party, had fallen to spell-wights in the forest.

This development almost, but only almost, overcame the fervor when Casimir emerged, moonstone held high. 

#

All my liege’s clerks were now up for grabs, along with the contacts and methods and secrets we possessed. Clerks had been killed before, to prevent them from joining a rival’s retinue. But, were I to approach a Cavalier myself, it would be seen as an attempt to steal secrets which I would then offer to another. I was reduced to hoping I received an offer before someone saw me as more conveniently put out of the way. 

Perhaps that’s why the fear-sapphire I spoke was so convincing. No one questioned Casimir’s second triumphant night. 

And then there remained only the third and final jewel of the protective brooch, the amethyst of true love. Possessed only by the Cavalier who has convinced a gem-speaker to love them, despite the previous scorn and fear. They are present but rare amid the raiment of court, bright enough to drown out anything but the proof of the person and the perils the wearer has conquered. 

After everything that had happened since I first spoke to Teodor, the third gem was simple to speak. 

#

I should have waited for him to find me, I knew, after Casimir emerged with the amethyst. But I felt the ground and walls pressing in on me, and I was desperate for air. I raced to the ramparts, where I watched the sea whipping itself into furious froth. 

The Keeper of Paths came into view, footsteps nearly silent beneath the wind, and I bent my head decorously. 

She perched her elbows on the rampart and seemed to study the sky. 

“I wonder,” she said casually, “how Casimir got the jewels.”

I became colder than even this wind could account for, as if she had just tossed me into the sea. 

Her hand moved and I turned, expecting a weapon, or a command to guards lurking nearby.

Only to find her raising a hand, brushing the backs of her fingers against her eyelashes, and suddenly in her palm —

A small emerald. 

I thought of the ornate, twisted hairstyles she always wore, never a lock free where it might brush against anyone or anything else. The gem was gone before I could think to look for where she hid it. 

“It’s only hair and lashes, for me,” she said. “It takes all of us differently.” 

I found I couldn’t speak, much less deny what she knew was true. 

“I’m not sure what’s been done to this castle, but it… changes us.”

I wished my mother could have known how right she was. 

“There are more of us than anyone thinks.” Sympathy crossed her face. “Some have more trouble hiding than others.” 

The crisp sea air seemed to rush into my throat, choking me, as I suddenly wondered how many of us had been convinced to help in similar frauds. 

She asked, “What broke you?” 

Because the gem the Duke wears by the dozen, the amethyst all would-be Cavaliers covet, isn’t the gem of love. 

It’s resignation. 

It’s being stripped of who you are, until you are only something that reflects the true heart, the true cruelty, of the one who caused you to speak it in the first place. History shows that every Ducal gem-speaker has eventually resigned themselves to their fate, and that resignation helped their Cavaliers to evade the spell-wights and fill Linviorenk’s coffers. 

I wasn’t sure what gem I would speak, if I spoke true love. 

And then, as though she had guessed what broke me, as though she understood my fear of not being turned into an even worse kind of pawn, she said, “I can get you out of Linviorenk.”

The Keeper of Paths knew every safe route through the forest and over the waters. 

“You’ll need to follow my instructions exactly. It would give too much away if I went with you.”

Whereas I would be easily ascribed to the maneuvering brought about by my liege’s death. Anyone who thought of me at all would likely assume someone else had done away with me rather than take me into their own retinue. 

I hesitated, struggling to put dullness into my words. “There’s someone… someone I would like to bring with me.”

“Another gem-speaker?”

I shook my head. 

“No. You’re not the first to get out, you’ll be going to the others. You’ll be safe there, but no one else can join. It’s hard enough keeping all of us safe when we’re the only ones who know.” 

#

The man in the indigo cloak will be at the southwestern gate when the clock strikes one…

The Keeper’s instructions ran over and over in my mind as I sat in my quarters, awaiting Teodor. He grinned when he saw me, but his joy quickly wavered. He didn’t have a pack to match the one slung across my back. 

“We don’t have to run!” he said, voice low but thrilled. 

“Casimir won’t help us?” 

“Look,” he said in the tone of one explaining a very simple concept. “Casimir’s not content to just help his great uncle. He wants more,” he couldn’t keep his own voice from rising, “he’s got plans to take all of Linviorenk, and he knows the two of us can help him get it!”

I began to realize the true danger of all the silences between us. “Before…” I gestured futilely. “Before, why did you want to escape?” I couldn’t keep my speech bland enough, and a rough shape fell from my mouth, hitting the floor before I could catch it. His eyes went right to it, and I covered it with my foot. 

I was increasingly convinced that silent meetings of eyes across rooms were not enough. He hadn’t come to our first meeting anticipating all of this.

Something had changed when that topaz fell into his palm. 

Teodor rolled his eyes. “I made some deals behind Oslwinel’s back and he found out before I wanted him to. He’s ended my contract. But Casimir likes how bold I am, that’s why he offered to keep us on!”

I pressed the tip of my tongue to the still-raw skin on the inside of my cheek, where the resignation gem had cut me. Of course, Casimir had offered Teodor this “option”. A Cavalier would never let someone so valuable join another’s retinue. And I imagined boldness could quickly become an inconvenience. 

I wanted to reason with him, but the instant I opened my mouth he hurried to speak first. “We’ll be safe forever and think of the money we can make!” He paused. “I love you.” 

I could stay here with him, and perhaps gain more power over this place than any gem-speaker had ever dreamed of before. Or I could meet the man in the indigo cloak when the clock struck one and flee. 

Teodor could speak of love all he wanted, yet I would never know if what fell from his lips was true. 

I let him wrap his arms around me, let him kiss me. Then I drew back, only just enough to murmur three words. 

“I love you.”

The final syllable ushered a jewel through my lips, cutting the inside of my mouth in three places. 

His hold on me tightened, warmth vanishing, but I kissed him again, hard enough to force the bloodied jewel into his mouth. I didn’t see what kind of jewel it was. 

I sensed the first instant it cut him, and the panicked pulsing of his throat as he inadvertently swallowed it. 

I held him as he struggled, until he was gone. 

END